Jan 05, 2009
2008 Review Of Richmond's Annum: Nov. And Dec.
January 5, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Combining Two Months Into One Post Because You Remember All This Stuff, It’s Already Jan. 5, And We’re Getting Lazy
Nov. 3: One day before the election, longshot mayoral candidate Lawrence Williams abruptly remembers that he’s running for mayor.
Nov. 4: Just as Virginia Board of Elections officials had suspected, a pack of four velociraptors storms a [...]
Dec 31, 2008
2008 Review Of Richmond's Annum: September
December 31, 2008 | Leave a Comment
The Month Advertisers Love ‘Cause It Rhymes With “To Remember”
Sept. 2: Henrico County Fashion Police fatally trash talk seven women after they were seen wearing white less than 24 hours after Labor Day.
Sept. 3: Whole Foods Market opens in western Henrico, because if there’s one thing people hate, it’s half-eaten food.
Sept. 11: Local man Jon [...]
Dec 29, 2008
2008 Review Of Richmond’s Annum: August
December 29, 2008 | Leave a Comment
A Month That Sucks If You’re In Grade School,
Or If You Just Plain Hate August
August 6:Louisville, Ky. resident Hayden Goode passes by downtown Richmond bar Sine six times in search of a bar called Shinay.
August 7:The new Segway of Richmond store begins encouraging customers to ride the two-wheeled transporters when hammered, which the owner says [...]
Dec 25, 2008
2008 Review Of Richmond’s Annum: July
December 25, 2008 | Leave a Comment
Because It Sounds Way Better Than Jufact
July 1: Thirteen protesters form a human chain by cementing their hands together in front of the entrance to Dominion. Police are able to simply move the radical environmentalists aside so traffic can properly flow, and all 13 are later violently eaten by wolves.
July 2: At least three dozen [...]
2008 Review Of Richmond’s Annum: June
December 25, 2008 | Leave a Comment
A Month Kinda Like The Movie, Only With An ‘-e’
And Not A Pregnant Teenager
June 3: Right-handed School Board member Keith West attempts to write his name with his left hand, but says later that he was unsuccessful and that trying to do so “felt a little weird.”
June 4: Virginia officials are unsure what to make [...]
Dec 19, 2008
2008 Review Of Richmond’s Annum: May
December 19, 2008 | Leave a Comment
May Or May Not, Who Knows: May Just Might
May 2:Richmond’s NBC12 takes weather-forecasting food technology to the next step, after its Arby’s WeatherNet radar begins beaming hot roast beef sandwiches into homes across the region.
May 5: Mayor L. Douglas Wilder defends his expensive eight-person security detail, saying their presence is required to protect him from [...]
Dec 18, 2008
2008 Review Of Richmond's Annum: April
December 18, 2008 | 1 Comment
A Month Containing The Only Day Of The Year
You’re Allowed To Joke Around
April 1: Capitalizing on “the perfect opportunity” to play an April Fools Day joke on someone, Richmond Mayor L. Douglas Wilder does the iconic Grey Poupon television commercial to a nearby car on his way to a meeting.
April 2: Local girlfriend Melanie Reed’s bed [...]
Dec 17, 2008
2008 Review Of Richmond’s Annum: March
December 17, 2008 | Leave a Comment
The Only Month Named After A
Drum Line Command
March 1: The VCU Medical Center announces opening dates for its $192 million critical-care hospital. In anticipation, area woman Rachel Westaway becomes less attentive when driving, starts playing with loaded handguns, and begins resting the radio on the side of her bathtub, all in hopes of spending a few [...]
Local Girlfriend Cuts Boyfriend-Interest Rate To All-Time Low
Fan District resident and girlfriend Audrey Rankin said yesterday that she has dropped her boyfriend-interest rate by nearly 74 points in a move that is expected to help stimulate her partner's investment into their two-year relationship.
The couple, according to Rankin, has been on the decline for the past six months amid boyfriend Andrew Adams' ...
