April 12, 2009
A barely-walking shell of the human being she was 12 hours prior, an utter trainwreck proudly told those around her at Fan bar Metro late Saturday night that she “didn’t even see a horse” during the Strawberry Hill races earlier in the afternoon.
“I swear, not a single horse, we didn’t see one, I swear, you guys, you don’t even, one, you don’t even know,” the driveling shitshow said, her sundress partially stained red from a 3:45 p.m. incident on the ice luge whereby the sloppy-hot mess wasn’t paying attention when the shots were being poured down the slopes. “Youseriouslydon’tevenknow.”
Continuing to tell everyone she could find about her lack of horse sightings and the fact that she was currently “so frigging wasted,” the legally-braindead disaster then stumbled outside the bar and into the street, where she was run over by a Mustang.
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Guy Who Lives Above 3 Monkeys Tired Of Asking Everyone To Keep It Down
Nick Cavalieri, who has lived in the apartment directly above 3 Monkeys Bar and Grill since November, is getting "more than fed up" with having to continuously tell his neighbors to be quiet, the 30-year-old said today.
"Monday through Sunday, I hear those guys partying pretty much every night," Cavalieri said. The University ...
Pretty sure I saw her. Yeah, come to think of it, I saw about 24 of her on Saturday shouting a chorus of “shuh-UHP” and “nuh-UGHH”, followed by multiple “Whooooo”s.
Then their nipples fell out. Shitshow, indeed.
Love the strong ending. Thanks for brightening my workday.
you make me giggle…