Despite New England’s 17-14 loss to the New York Giants in Super Bowl XLII last night, Patriots quarterback Tom Brady told reporters that he still awoke this morning loved by women around the world and within inches of supermodel Gisele Bundchen.

Brady said he would have been gratified to make the Pats’ season a picture-perfect 19-0, but would gladly accept 34-24-34. 

“We played a great game on top of a great season, but it wasn’t enough.  I’m disappointed in myself,” Brady told reporters, “though when I really look at the grand scheme of things, not everyone can lose a Super Bowl then wake up the next morning beside a Brazilian woman who is hotter than the 2007 Dow Jones Industrial Average.”

Brady added that he was just proud to be able to “keep his head on straight” while dating a hot celebrity, “unlike some other NFL quarterbacks I know.”

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